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Hollywood keeps on rebooting everything over and over again, and always seems to get it wrong. So Tanner and Lindsay have decided to get one step ahead of them and reboot everything themselves! Through reboots, remakes, sequels, spin-offs, adaptations, and other weird scenarios, these two are gonna change it all for better or worse - which, sometimes, is still better.
Episodes
Wednesday Jan 07, 2026
Wednesday Jan 07, 2026
The legend of Tomyris (the legend) is kinda fascinating, but The Legend of Tomiris (the film) squanders those parts and manages to be really long and say very little about the title character or her people. Plus, y'know, there's just a dash of propoganda baked into it. But Tanner wants there to be a good film about this warrior queen, and Lindsay wants it to be a film that does justice to both parties (and becomes a better film about Kazakhstan than Borat). So let's send some documentarians off to 530 BCE and interview Tomyris and Cyrus in person!
If you'd like to be on an episode, submit your pitch at https://forms.gle/DQiGdNRMFcz3po256. If you'd like to support the show directly, we have a Patreon along with the rest of the Corner Podcast shows at https://www.patreon.com/c/CornerPodcastNetwork.
Our cover art is by Alex aka @ptchew, and her work can be found on ptchew.com. Our theme music is by Shawn Clake.
Our email is NotIfIRebootYouFirst@gmail.com. If you would like to send us a friendship promo, or just give general feedback, feel free to contact us! Join our Discord at https://discord.gg/Hf8Y2yEJPe.
You can find this podcast on BlueSky @NIIRYFPod, Lindsay @LindsayM476, and Tanner @SparkyUpstart.
Monday Dec 22, 2025
Monday Dec 22, 2025
Mega Man Star Force 4 only got as far as a concept, but it's enough of a concept for Tanner to spin into a whole pitch and game summary (which is good, because Lindsay knows almost nothing about any Mega Mans). They'll set the teenage blue bomber against systemic corruption while also discussing Capcom's Broad-Strokes universe, fitting tarot motifs, and flirting with your situationship's tsunderes as a bit.
If you'd like to be on an episode, submit your pitch at https://forms.gle/DQiGdNRMFcz3po256. If you'd like to support the show directly, we have a Patreon along with the rest of the Corner Podcast shows at https://www.patreon.com/c/CornerPodcastNetwork.
Our cover art is by Alex aka @ptchew, and her work can be found on ptchew.com. Our theme music is by Shawn Clake.
Our email is NotIfIRebootYouFirst@gmail.com. If you would like to send us a friendship promo, or just give general feedback, feel free to contact us! Join our Discord at https://discord.gg/Hf8Y2yEJPe.
You can find this podcast on BlueSky @NIIRYFPod, Lindsay @LindsayM476, and Tanner @SparkyUpstart.
Monday Dec 08, 2025
Monday Dec 08, 2025
Let's get a little meta today. Lindsay's not quite remaking Jamaica Inn so much as paying homage to it, with the tale of a woman using the book as a guide to explore all the English lore and history in Cornwall. But with some local cultists being haunted by the past and detesting the future, will the young lady make it out alive? And does this story have room for animal ghosts, the knights templar, and looming uncles? Only time will tell...
If you'd like to be on an episode, submit your pitch at https://forms.gle/DQiGdNRMFcz3po256. If you'd like to support the show directly, we have a Patreon along with the rest of the Corner Podcast shows at https://www.patreon.com/c/CornerPodcastNetwork.
Our cover art is by Alex aka @ptchew, and her work can be found on ptchew.com. Our theme music is by Shawn Clake.
Our email is NotIfIRebootYouFirst@gmail.com. If you would like to send us a friendship promo, or just give general feedback, feel free to contact us! Join our Discord at https://discord.gg/Hf8Y2yEJPe.
You can find this podcast on BlueSky @NIIRYFPod, Lindsay @LindsayM476, and Tanner @SparkyUpstart.
Monday Nov 24, 2025
Monday Nov 24, 2025
Point Break is a patently silly premise executed shockingly well? Why are we rebooting this? Well, it's not explicitly gay and we gotta change that. But that's not enough for an entire episode, so we also have to figure out ways to do things differently without disrupting the hyper-heightened atmosphere. Along the way we'll discuss unexpected places to develop film tech, Buseys all the way down, and NOT the remake from 2015 (it's not real and it can't hurt you).
If you'd like to be on an episode, submit your pitch at https://forms.gle/DQiGdNRMFcz3po256. If you'd like to support the show directly, we have a Patreon along with the rest of the Corner Podcast shows at https://www.patreon.com/c/CornerPodcastNetwork.
Our cover art is by Alex aka @ptchew, and her work can be found on ptchew.com. Our theme music is by Shawn Clake.
Our email is NotIfIRebootYouFirst@gmail.com. If you would like to send us a friendship promo, or just give general feedback, feel free to contact us! Join our Discord at https://discord.gg/Hf8Y2yEJPe.
You can find this podcast on BlueSky @NIIRYFPod, Lindsay @LindsayM476, and Tanner @SparkyUpstart.
Monday Nov 10, 2025
Monday Nov 10, 2025
The Lady Vanishes seems like a real outlier among the rest of Albert Hitchcock's works - maybe because he didn't write the story, or the script, and only fulfilled it out of contractual obligation. But it's still pretty solid! Just very wacky and slapstick for what advertises itself as a wartime spy thriller with actual gaslighting and suspect love interest. She'd prefer to push it in a more realistic direction, but there's still enough room for some cricket weirdos, a c***y nun, and Brits Who Love Dogs.
If you'd like to be on an episode, submit your pitch at https://forms.gle/DQiGdNRMFcz3po256. If you'd like to support the show directly, we have a Patreon along with the rest of the Corner Podcast shows at https://www.patreon.com/c/CornerPodcastNetwork.
Our cover art is by Alex aka @ptchew, and her work can be found on ptchew.com. Our theme music is by Shawn Clake.
Our email is NotIfIRebootYouFirst@gmail.com. If you would like to send us a friendship promo, or just give general feedback, feel free to contact us! Join our Discord at https://discord.gg/Hf8Y2yEJPe.
You can find this podcast on BlueSky @NIIRYFPod, Lindsay @LindsayM476, and Tanner @SparkyUpstart!
Sunday Nov 09, 2025
Sunday Nov 09, 2025
Years ago, Not If I Reboot You First started a Patreon just to help cover hosting costs, but we ended up putting it on ice because we felt we couldn't come up with enough bonus stuff to warrant it, and because we were both in positions were we could pay for podcast hosting anyway.
Nowadays - well, we can still cover costs, but NIIRYF has become part of the Corner Podcast Network, alongside Loser Like Me, The Home for Wayward OCs, and occasional other shows like Faith Full and You, The Devil, and D&D. That's more pods to host, as well as editors and sometimes title card artists to pay. So we've revived the NIIRYF Patreon and converted it into the Patreon for the entire Corner Podcast Network.
What does this entail? Right now, not much. Across our shows we've got a great fanbase, but it's not a huge one. We also know that times have been tough across the board. So at this time, this is basically a soft-launch of the patreon to see how it would go. We are starting at just one tier, worth $2. The reward for that tier is a shout-out. That's all! That's all we want to commit to right now. The discord and the guest submissions for the podcasts which have those will remain open to the public. Essentially, this is a tip jar and a audience reaction gauge. But if it goes well, we've discussed things like making bonus content, releasing episodes more often on our regular feeds for some shows, and doing audience participation - but that's all topics for later.
...Okay actually, let's talk about audience participation real quick. There's an upcoming episode of NIIRYF that can make use of some listener suggestions and prompts, so! If you subscribe to our Patreon before December 11th, 2025, you will get the chance to pitch a Mega Man boss that Tanner and Lindsay will discuss on air, and potentially decide to put into the hypothetical game they are pitching. This isn't going to be a regular patron benefit YET, it's just another soft-launch element, but again, we wanna see how people respond to it. If it seems popular, great! We'll see what we can do with that more often, maybe for other shows. If not, don't worry about it!
We don't expect everyone listening to this to donate to our stuff, and anything we do get will go directly to covering hosting and editing costs. But knowing that other people are willing to invest in us would help us invest more in these shows ourselves. We don't dream of being full-time podcasters, but it would be great if we had the funds to reach a little higher, you know? And even if you can't support us monetarily, it would be a huge help to tell your friends about us - having a wider audience and bigger reach would be a major boon as well.
No matter how this test goes, we appreciate everyone who has listened in the past and continues listening to us today. That's what you missed on the Corner Podcast Network - thanks for stopping by, and we hope to see you again - even if we reboot you first. Bye!
Monday Oct 27, 2025
Monday Oct 27, 2025
Animorphs was so great that some people definitely tried to make their own in the 90s, and one of those attempts was Mindwarp! It didn't succeed nearly as well, but Tanner thinks it's worth revisiting it's various interesting moments and clear plot hooks that never got expanded on thanks to a clearly hasty order to wrap things up. Together with Lindsay they'll expand it into a full tv series, all while discussing being the pyromaniac girl, divorce-ageddon, and putting a kid in a meat grinder.
If you'd like to be on an episode, submit your pitch at https://forms.gle/DQiGdNRMFcz3po256!
Our cover art is by Alex aka @ptchew, and her work can be found on ptchew.com. Our theme music is by Shawn Clake.
Our email is NotIfIRebootYouFirst@gmail.com. If you would like to send us a friendship promo, or just give general feedback, feel free to contact us! Join our Discord at https://discord.gg/Hf8Y2yEJPe.
You can find this podcast on BlueSky @NIIRYFPod, Lindsay @LindsayM476, and Tanner @SparkyUpstart!
Monday Oct 13, 2025
Monday Oct 13, 2025
Lindsay's Halloween episode is a little bit of a twist, as she's taking Terminator and looking at it through some new lenses, like Time Travel and Frankenstein. Can we break the cycle of bad parenting? Are we too queer to understand time loops and time spirals? And how will we address the Tron Ares Situation?
This episode has no guest, but is inspired by a video from diamandahagan.bsky.social, and you can see it here: https://youtu.be/lQjQJMRSaXU?si=zYyzMaGVkwbuRdsc
If you'd like to be on an episode, submit your pitch at https://forms.gle/DQiGdNRMFcz3po256.
Our cover art is by Alex aka @ptchew, and her work can be found on ptchew.com. Our theme music is by Shawn Clake.
Our email is NotIfIRebootYouFirst@gmail.com. If you would like to send us a friendship promo, or just give general feedback, feel free to contact us! Join our Discord at https://discord.gg/Hf8Y2yEJPe.
You can find this podcast on BlueSky @NIIRYFPod, Lindsay @LindsayM476, and Tanner @SparkyUpstart.
Monday Sep 29, 2025
Monday Sep 29, 2025
Oh hey, it's time for our new annual tradition, rebooting a season of Penny Dreadful! In the second season we had to deal with witches, porcelain dolls, and some really baffling character decisions. Can we rectify it with Dracula canon, interconnected character arcs, and normal sex?
If you'd like to be on an episode, submit your pitch at https://forms.gle/DQiGdNRMFcz3po256.
Our cover art is by Alex aka @ptchew, and her work can be found on ptchew.com. Our theme music is by Shawn Clake.
Our email is NotIfIRebootYouFirst@gmail.com. If you would like to send us a friendship promo, or just give general feedback, feel free to contact us! Join our Discord at https://discord.gg/Hf8Y2yEJPe.
You can find this podcast on BlueSky @NIIRYFPod, Lindsay @LindsayM476, and Tanner @SparkyUpstart.
Monday Sep 15, 2025
Monday Sep 15, 2025
It's time for the annual Q&A! Sit back, relax, and listen as Tanner and Lindsay discuss rebooting bands, era specific media, and how to make cops not be cops.
If you'd like to be on an episode, submit your pitch at https://forms.gle/DQiGdNRMFcz3po256.
Our cover art is by Alex aka @ptchew, and her work can be found on ptchew.com. Our theme music is by Shawn Clake.
Our email is NotIfIRebootYouFirst@gmail.com. If you would like to send us a friendship promo, or just give general feedback, feel free to contact us! Join our Discord at https://discord.gg/Hf8Y2yEJPe.
You can find this podcast on BlueSky @NIIRYFPod, Lindsay @LindsayM476, and Tanner @SparkyUpstart.