Not If I Reboot You First!

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Episodes

Hollywood keeps on rebooting everything over and over again, and always seems to get it wrong. So Tanner and Lindsay have decided to get one step ahead of them and reboot everything themselves! Through reboots, remakes, sequels, spin-offs, adaptations, and other weird scenarios, these two are gonna change it all for better or worse - which, sometimes, is still better.

Episodes

Sunday Dec 02, 2018

11: Lindsay and Tanner Throw Shade at the Prairies [Sherlock Holmes]

Sunday Dec 02, 2018

This week Lindsay and Tanner join forces to discuss their idea for a modern Sherlock Holmes adaptation, with a bunch of other amateur sleuths added in. It features a discussion on mental illness in several public domain detectives, lots of gender flipping, and the universal Watson. We also discuss relatives with the same names, University seating arrangements, and yelling at Houdini.

This episode of Not If I Reboot You First is released under a Creative Commons Attribution Non-Commercial Share-a-like 4.0 International Licence. For more information, please visit creativecommons.org.

Our cover art is by Alex aka @ptchew, and her work can be found on ptchew.com. Our theme music is "The Metamorphosis [Instrumental]" by Osiris Saline, courtesy of the Free Music Archive.

Our email is NotIfIRebootYouFirst@gmail.com. If you would like to be a guest, send us a friendship promo, or just have general feedback, feel free to contact us! If you are willing to support us financially, our Patreon can be found at patreon.com/NotIfIRebootYouFirst.

Find us on twitter:

@NIIRYFpod

@SparkyUpstart

@Lindsaym476

Sunday Nov 25, 2018

10: Tanner Can Relate to an Emo Bird [Animorphs]

Sunday Nov 25, 2018

It's all in Tanner's hands this week as they bring Animorphs to the table - though since Lindsay never read the books it's mostly just Tanner gushing about it. They talk about the franchise making all the wrong merchandising decisions, and how to adapt it in a way that doesn’t detract from the morality plays and mature subject matter the series tackled. Also discussed is Lindsay's constitution score of zero and Tanner's ability to make anything sound gayer than it probably is. They also coin the term "flesh Voltron".

Our cover art is by Alex aka @ptchew, and her work can be found on ptchew.com. Our theme music is "The Metamorphosis [Instrumental]" by Osiris Saline, courtesy of the Free Music Archive.

Find us on twitter:

@NIIRYFpod

@SparkyUpstart

@Lindsaym476

Sunday Nov 18, 2018

9: Lindsay Plays Fortnite with Serena [Sailor Moon]

Sunday Nov 18, 2018

Aloha listeners! Lindsay’s gotten us all tickets to an American live-action reboot of Sailor Moon in Hawaii! It’s got everything: an Usagi who games, multiple uses for the term “cousin”, and Lindsay trying real hard to sell the toy rights to Hasbro. They also discuss the hypnotist from their real-life after-grad party, Tanner’s accents going all over the place, and what infernal forces have trapped Carlos in The Zone for all eternity.

Our cover art is by Alex aka @ptchew, and her work can be found on ptchew.com. Our theme music is "The Metamorphosis [Instrumental]" by Osiris Saline, courtesy of the Free Music Archive.

Find us on twitter:

@NIIRYFpod

@SparkyUpstart

@Lindsaym476

Sunday Nov 11, 2018

8: Tanner Inspires Teens to Do Crimes [Ocean's Eleven]

Sunday Nov 11, 2018

It's a retro flashback episode full of 80s cheese and 70s sleaze when Tanner proposes that they and Lindsay create a prequel to the Ocean's Eleven heist movie franchise. Tanner digs into the deep lore gleaned from all four movies to create the story of Danny and Debbie Ocean's first job, with Lindsay providing all the historical information on aesthetics and highly stupid real world crooks. Along the way they also discuss how big Canada is, the cinematic masterpiece that is Catch That Kid, and their goal of packing bicons into every possible reboot they can.

Our cover art is by Alex aka @ptchew, and her work can be found on ptchew.com. Our theme music is "The Metamorphosis [Instrumental]" by Osiris Saline, courtesy of the Free Music Archive.

Find us on twitter:

@NIIRYFpod

@SparkyUpstart

@Lindsaym476

Sunday Nov 04, 2018

7: Lindsay Rants about History (and Daylight Savings) [Francis Pegahmagabow]

Sunday Nov 04, 2018

This week Lindsay is creating something new: a film based on the life story of Francis Pegahmagabow, a Canadian First Nations soldier from WWI who went on to do some pretty great stuff both during and after the conflict. She and Tanner also get serious when talking about the treatment of First Nations peoples in Canada and the importance of standing against fascism. Though along the way they do come across some lighter stuff, like how to earn a nickname in the CAF, why you should pee in your hankie, and how the Schlieffen Plan is just the worst, y’all.

Our cover art is by Alex aka @ptchew, and her work can be found on ptchew.com. Our theme music is "The Metamorphosis [Instrumental]" by Osiris Saline, courtesy of the Free Music Archive.

Our email is NotIfIRebootYouFirst@gmail.com. If you would like to be a guest, send us a friendship promo, or just have general feedback, feel free to contact us! If you are willing to support us financially, our patreon can be found at patreon.com/NotIfIRebootYouFirst.

Find us on twitter:

@NIIRYFPod
@sparkyupstart
@lindsaym476

Sunday Oct 28, 2018

6: Tanner Googles Akhenaten Memes [The Mummy (1999)]

Sunday Oct 28, 2018

Tanner's a little sick this week - maybe they were cursed by The Mummy! They're rebooting that film for the fourth or fifth time this week, and with Lindsay they'll discuss how to make a good cinematic universe, complain about death gods always getting the villain treatment, and wonder if Lindsay can be (legally) mummified and eaten after her demise. Along the way they also come across Pre-Raphaelite Tide Pod challenges, Egyptian-style Pokemon designs, and regular dudes named Imhotep.

Our cover art is by Alex aka @ptchew, and her work can be found on ptchew.com. Our theme music is "The Metamorphosis [Instrumental]" by Osiris Saline, courtesy of the Free Music Archive.

Our email is NotIfIRebootYouFirst@gmail.com. If you would like to be a guest, send us a friendship promo, or just have general feedback, feel free to contact us! If you are willing to support us financially, our patreon can be found at patreon.com/NotIfIRebootYouFirst.

Find us on twitter:

@NIIRYFPod
@sparkyupstart
@lindsaym476

Sunday Oct 21, 2018

5: Lindsay Avoids Being Haunted by Lions [The Ghost and The Darkness]

Sunday Oct 21, 2018

Content warning for animal violence - we do talk about what animal attacks can do in some detail.

This week, Lindsay brings to the table The Ghost and The Darkness, a horror movie based on real life(!) man-eating lions attacking a construction site in the 1890s, followed by a 1990s movie with screentime-eating actors. She and Tanner end up going on lovely tangents about how animals are simultaneously awesome, hilarious, dumb, and deadly. Other tangents include ranking the Batmen, taking shots at colonialism (as you do), and getting flying appendages delivered to your door.

Our cover art is by Alex aka @ptchew, and her work can be found on ptchew.com. Our theme music is "The Metamorphosis [Instrumental]" by Osiris Saline, courtesy of the Free Music Archive.

Our email is NotIfIRebootYouFirst@gmail.com. If you would like to be a guest, send us a friendship promo, or just have general feedback, feel free to contact us! If you are willing to support us financially, our patreon can be found at patreon.com/NotIfIRebootYouFirst.

Find us on twitter:

@NIIRYFPod
@sparkyupstart
@lindsaym476

Sunday Oct 14, 2018

4: Tanner Learns about the Goth Life Cycle [Underworld]

Sunday Oct 14, 2018

In this weeks episode, Tanner brings to the table the neo-noir action-goth film Underworld. They and Lindsay take it to task on why its fantastic racism narrative works even less than usual examples, and Tanner tries to improve it by introducing more sympathetic characters. Along the way they also come across vampires with weak names and werewolves who's names Tanner refused to google, and they definitely don't discuss Disney's Z-o-m-b-i-e-s.

Our cover art is by Alex aka @ptchew, and her work can be found on ptchew.com. Our theme music is "The Metamorphosis [Instrumental]" by Osiris Saline, courtesy of the Free Music Archive.

Our email is NotIfIRebootYouFirst@gmail.com. If you would like to be a guest, send us a friendship promo, or just have general feedback, feel free to contact us! If you are willing to support us financially, our patreon can be found at patreon.com/NotIfIRebootYouFirst.

Find us on twitter:

@NIIRYFPod
@sparkyupstart
@lindsaym476

Sunday Oct 07, 2018

3: Lindsay Summons Satan in a Court of Law [The Nun]

Sunday Oct 07, 2018

The latest entry in the Conjuring Cinematic Universe landed a few weeks ago, bringing all it's Soviet-less historical inaccuracies with it - and Lindsay's have nun of that. She takes apart The Nun, giving Tanner a crash course on the split between Roman Catholocism and the Orthodoxy, the latter's team-up with Stalin, and the terrible fallout that ensued in real life. Along the way they also encounter Ed and Lorraine Warren's demon scams, Vlad Dracula's Corpse Forest, and all the greatest cold war pop singles

Our cover art is by Alex aka @ptchew, and her work can be found on ptchew.com. Our theme music is "The Metamorphosis [Instrumental]" by Osiris Saline, courtesy of the Free Music Archive.

Our email is NotIfIRebootYouFirst@gmail.com. If you would like to be a guest, send us a friendship promo, or just have general feedback, feel free to contact us! If you are willing to support us financially, our patreon can be found at patreon.com/NotIfIRebootYouFirst.

Find us on twitter:

@NIIRYFPod
@sparkyupstart
@lindsaym476

Monday Oct 01, 2018

2: Tanner Takes the Breakfast Club to Denny's [The Breakfast Club]

Monday Oct 01, 2018

This week, Tanner is rebooting the classic teen film The Breakfast Club. Them and Lindsay will determine how to improve its portrayal of adolescent angst and public school library architecture. Along the way they also encounter proper method acting, 80s rich girl problems, and canine fashion choices.

Our cover art is by Alex aka @ptchew, and her work can be found on ptchew.com. Our theme music is "The Metamorphosis [Instrumental]" by Osiris Saline, courtesy of the Free Music Archive.

Find us on twitter:

@NIIRYFPod
@sparkyupstart
@lindsaym476